Tuesday, January 27, 2009

Blowing up puppies

PANIC NOT! No actual puppies will be harmed before the fact or after the fact in connection with generating this post, but RantWoman is just going to have to wait to appreciate puppy cuteness in person rather than by email.

RantWoman likes to start her day with e-greetings to and from all her friends. This can be dangerous because of the risk of getting sucked away from the to-do list--or in this case sucked into an internet maelstrom.

RantWoman's friend Ms. J got two new puppies somewhere toward the end of the Snowpocalypse. RantWoman assumes the puppies are terribly cute. RantWoman even has photographic evidence in her email that purports to depict this overweaning cuteness. So far, despite more than enough technology and skills, presumably, to appreciate this cuteness, RantWoman only got the cuteness summary last night from another friend's telephone photo descriptive service.

How can this be? The two lovely .jpg files came into email fine. They had a topical subject line. They opened fine. RantWoman had the screen enlarger set at its usual settings and saw in one image two mounds she assumes are sleeping puppies though she cannot find any recognizable limbs. The other image has a big sweet picture of a beaming Ms. J and a clear view of the flowered upholstery on the chair behind her but RantWoman could not find any puppies.

RantWoman tried using the drag bars to move around and look at the image. She tried the screen enlarger's focus moving buttons that shift images differently than the drag bars. RantWoman even tried disabling the screen enlarger entirely to try for a big picture look to help her zero in on key details at a bigger magnification. At some point RantWoman just lost patience and decided to get on with life. So far, the expected astronomical overall puppy cuteness quotient is completely lost on RantWoman.

Only last night, while talking about the puppies with the Telephone Photo Descriptive Service did RantWoman learn the full cuteness detail: Super Cute Kitten who lives with the two new puppies is, in one picture asleep on the two puppies. Everyone say "ohhhhhh!"

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