Testimony

Someone gave RantWoman a ride home tonight and asked how RantWoman's testimony went last week. Testimony? RantWoman had almost forgotten. The short answer: most gratifyingly along with a Fun with Vision Loss moment.

The longer answer: this was testimony before a state senate committee on two pieces of legislation where RantWoman feels need of more research but also felt confident that she could say something cogent. RantWoman is trying not to let the heady experience for the first time ever of offering live testimony in such a venue go to her head. Unfortunately, since the issue is still live and this is just not that sort of blog, RantWoman wishes to keep her readers guessing about the exact material. RantWoman is also hovering between a total complex and just laughing really hard about the Fun With Vision Loss moment.

The even longer version: RantWoman has been writing public officials about this and that since high school. One of the officials RantWoman used to write in those hoary mists of prehistory before the worldwide web is still in office and his long tenure comes with specific perquisites. So once in a great while in fact RantWoman writes in typical forward RantWoman style and says something along the lines of "...not your constituent anymore...your entire party needs your leadership...this is how RantWoman wants you to lead...." RantWoman is not in a position to comment about whether her words have any impact.

RantWoman used to fill pages with heartfelt scrawl about a number of related topics. In one case over a period of several months, she was rewarded with several copies from the addressee, a different politician than the one above, of the same word-processed boilerplate about his view of the policy with maybe a customized dismissive paragraph about the particular aspect of the topic RantWoman had written about.

It did not take RantWoman long to catch on about the boilerplate. Then one time she was comparing notes with other constituents and everyone learned we were all getting the same boilerplate. Well, one time the boilerplate came in an envelope stamped with something in a foreign language that caused RantWoman to think her name had probably gotten onto a list somewhere. Since RantWoman also writes letters to the editor she decided merely to note the circumstance, but she did note it.

Then RantWoman moved out of state and got a new set of public officials to write to and put aside thoughts of that politician until the recently-ended reign of The Worst President Ever. By comparison with those surrounding The Worst President Ever, RantWoman's former correspondent is a voice of complete sanity and clear-headed perspicacity no matter how many times he sent RantWoman the same boilerplate!

These days in the age of anthrax and Homeland Security and automated e-mail counters, RantWoman seldom fools around with pen and paper. Whenever possible, RantWoman is happy to tick a box on a pre-written electronic missive. Once in a while, RantWoman still composes her own email, but the exigencies of time save everyone, sender and recipient from laboring long over their work.


The same actually goes for live testimony! RantWoman had a chauffeur who had invited her to the festive occasion and helped her find the right list to put her name on about testimony. RantWoman's chauffeur actually has a more impressive job title than chauffeur; he advised RantWoman just to keep it short. RantWoman explained that she does not do wall clocks and really cannot tell for instance by judging facial expression whether, perhaps, just maybe, possibly she could conceivably be boring her listeners silly and suggested her chauffeur might just give her sleeve a good tug when her time was close to running out.

RantWoman wound up nowhere near someone who could have tugged her sleeve. When called, RantWoman found her way to the designated seating and mics for those giving testimony. RantWoman briefly introduced herself including mention of how RantWoman probably benefited from what the state lege did last round. Then RantWoman advocated spending at least as much money this time around as last and including the voice of disabled people in decisionmaking about how to get the work done. Then RantWoman launched into some topical whines she figured the funds might possibly assist in amelioriating.

This was going swimmingly until the Chairman of the Committee said "Thank you very much. We got your point about inclusion. Please suggest some wording to...." RantWoman was thrilled by the reception especially since she had put her point near the top nearly as an afterthought. RantWoman also permitted herself a twinge of embarrassment though only a twinge of embarrassment to possibly have been boring the Chairman of a State Senate Committee and not even to have been able to tell.