Monday, August 17, 2015

Mobile with purple green beans

RantWoman, can we come kidnap you tomorrow?

 RantWoman’s buddies the Weed Whackin Wenches have sort of abandoned the blogosphere for a life of suburban gardening, walkability exercises and nimal husbandry in the realm of chickens and fresh eggs, mason bees, and bushy tailed squirrels for the C-dog to chase. There are also some nearly invisible cats and random other critters. But the main point is that unless you read RantWoman or know how to find the Wenches on Facebook, you not gonna find them in the blogosphere. But it’s nice of them to ask before any actual kidnapping occurs.

No, you do not get to kidnap me because I owe the world a long meeting, but I need to come up your way anyway after the meeting and I have a strong stomach about eldercare updates, especially if I get fresh eggs and purple green beans out of the deal, so how about….?

 Cue that wide awake at 4 am feeling, some morning home details, and urgent communication about wireless data plan. Is RantWoman happy with options? Uhhh, reserving judgment.

 Cue mid-meeting email saying RantWoman has two not one packages to pick up.

Cue a couple mid-meeting emails from RantWoman about things to follow up on from the meeting Cue evil autocorrect rendering at least one message completely unintelligible to the recipient but knowing the combination of recipients, RantWoman will be able to reconstruct

 Cue the end of meeting, the Rapid Ride, and the Snohomish County version of Rapid Ride, called Swift and WingNut’s directions about which stop to aim for.  RantWoman really appreciates being able to read the map at the Aurora Village Transit center for one thing because RantWoman’s technological channels are so addled one might want to assume Mercury is in retrograde except RantWoman is not going to look up and find out.

 Cue multiple telecomm dances: data, trying Twitter by wifi on the bus (UGH! As if RantWoman did not already have a sense of needing to clean house in her data streams), a dying cellphone battery, and a bus stop rendezvous, just in time before RantWoman’s Smartphone would have rolled over and played dead.

Cue need to froth at the keyboard about what RantWoman is and is not willing to pay for in the realm of telecomm experiences. IX-NAY on PAYING to get endless ads. IX-NAY on PAYING to look at billing / account management stuff. If you want RantWoman's money, she had better be able AT LEAST to get at her bills. Stay tuned for more exatravagant detail about RantWoman behavior patterns..


Cue ride to the Wenches’.  Cue urgent need to plug in Smartphone and find restroom to relive bus bladder, in approximately that order.


Cue opportunity to show off Smartphone. The Wenches text each other madly on their plain phones but so far have dodged Smartphone. Curmudgeon’s vision and accessibility needs are similar enough to RantWoman’s that actual hands on device experience planted all kinds of ideas. Now they get to figure out family plan, network, contract or no contract (NO contract!) Sounds like the Wenches also need some butt-dial prevention options!


Cue grand tour: chickens, blueberries, racks of multiple kinds of beans, squashes, watermelon, flowers for pollinators, onions, various fruit planting experiments: plums, figs, even pineapple and avocado, eggplant, tomatoes…


Cue really tasty meal and lots and lots of good conversation echoing while RantWoman juggles….

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